Travel Tip #9 PLAN. PLAN. PLAN.
Carefully plan trips with companions. That is the key to a successful trip, especially when you have interests that lead you in one direction and your companion has interests leading him or her in an entirely different direction. Nothing spoils a great vacation more than a squabble over where to go, how to get there, and how to “enjoy” the destination. I’ve traveled with friends, family, my spouse, and --- in the old days --- with schoolmates. The absolute freedom of hitting the road alone leaves every stop, every break, every side trip, and every destination absolutely a matter of one’s own preferences. Traveling with another party changes everything.

So, here are a few ideas for making the trip as wonderful as it can possibly be.

1) Take your companion’s interests into consideration. My husband loves antique stores, flea markets, junk stores, bicycle shops, theatre, concerts, parades, anything with a fish in it, and weird destinations. We MUST make it to the world’s largest ball of yarn --- or something like that! I love museums, historic sites, theatre, concerts, light hearted entertainment parks like Disney, great food, art, and scenic byways. Several years ago I went to our travel agent and explained my husband’s interests. Then I enumerated my loves. Finally, I gave him a budget and told him to plan the perfect trip. We ended up driving to Toronto where my husband and I parted early in the day. He went to some riverfront market destination. I went to a marvelous museum. Late in the afternoon, we met back at the hotel and went to dinner before traveling on to see Phantom of the Opera. Our hotel room was a first class suite at the top of the hotel where we overlooked the city skyline. Perfect. Win-win situation.

2) Strive for a win-win situation so that people enjoy the trip. When our daughter was little and going through a picky eating phase, she would eat only at McDonalds. On our trip to Disney World, we made a point of getting her meals first, and then we would go to another restaurant for seafood or steaks --- whatever.

On my recent trip to Florida, I planned my itinerary for the first half of the trip so that I did everything I wanted to do. My husband flew to Orlando where we
celebrated his birthday at Epcot and visited friends in central Florida. Then I told him to tell me which direction he wanted to go. I was ready to set the GPS and make hotel reservations according to his whims. I was pleasantly surprised when he announced at dinner one evening that he wanted to see the largest aquarium in the world --- in Atlanta. Cool.

Once we got to Atlanta, I wanted to see the Martin Luther King Historic Site and the Carter Presidential Library and Museum. Initially we planned for me to do separate sight seeing in the afternoon while he perused every exhibit at the aquarium. But once he saw his beluga whales, his hammerhead shark, and a host of other sea creatures swimming all around us in the underwater tunnel he was ready to leave, so we went to the historic sites together.

Then there was Stone Mountain. And Mount Airy, North Carolina (Mayberry). We paced ourselves carefully, but I gave him a lot of latitude for deciding where we would go, how much time we would spend there, and how many hours of driving we would do each day. The second half of the trip was his. The first half of the trip was mine.

3) Pack comfortable clothes and check the weather carefully. At one point it was
so chilly at Epcot’s Jose Feliciano Concert, my husband was nearly frozen to the
bleacher seat. I shooed him toward the closest gift shop to warm up. By the time I joined him, I insisted that he invest in a hooded sweatshirt. No need to be miserable.

4)Be considerate in the hotel room. Share the remote. Pack your favorite mystery
in the suitcase so you will be entertained while he watches his favorite show on TV.

5)Check frequently to see how your companion is doing. Is s/he tired, hungry,
anxious to take a side trip, disappointed by the agenda? Keep checking to
see what will make the trip comfortable and rewarding. Do not wait until nerves are frazzled and tempers flare. Whoa! Way too late for correcting the problem.

6)Speak up about your interests. A happy relationship is not a lose-win conciliation. In other words, never sacrifice your happiness for someone else’s pleasure. Find hotels, restaurants, sights, activities, and rest stops according to both people’s loves. It can be done. It is your trip too. If you hate to cook on a camping trip, volunteer to drive to Colonel Sanders’ and bring back a heaping pile of chicken in a bucket. (Make sure your companion likes chicken.)

7)Try to find a happy way to manage differences in sleeping patterns. On trips to Washington, DC, I often sleep “in.” My husband is an early riser. He heads out on the streets to visit with homeless people and offer them a meal. He always offers the homeless friendship and food. It is an endearing quality that never fails to impress me. He sees humanity where the masses see nothing.

I get to sleep late. He gets up and makes a beeline for another destination so my sleep is not disturbed. On other occasions, he gets up early, has breakfast in the hotel dining area and then he brings me juice, fruit, cereal, milk, and hot tea to our room. Aaah --- breakfast in bed. Win-win.

8)I love cross country trips. He likes to fly to one destination. So this year I drove ahead to Florida and he cruised into Orlando on Southwest --- yammering to some
inquisitive triplets about the joy they expected to experience at --- where else --- Disney World!

9)Don’t overdo it. Fatigue is a subtle spoiler of trips. Plan lots of breaks and plan on being flexible. Add a day or two to your itinerary so you can spend less time on the road if the old fatigue problem threatens to spoil the fun. An extra day or two also gives you the option of taking a side trip to a light house or a museum or an aquarium. Plan on having fun.

10)Plan a budget that will allow you to enjoy the trip. Clip hotel coupons from the
booklets provided at rest areas. When we got home, my husband made a point of
thanking me for managing the hotel stops with discounts, convenience, smoke free accommodations, and restaurant convenience. Take on an equal amount of responsibility so that one person is not being the “Super Woman” or “Super Traveler” while everybody else uses the hours for fun. Be clear about who is driving, how far each day’s drive will be, and who will manage route planning, hotels, meals, etc.

11)Keep a supply of food and water on hand in case growling tummies cannot wait
for the next stop twenty miles down the road. I carry a Ziploc bag filled with plastic spoons. A scoop of peanut butter (the jar fits marvelously in the drink container holder) will quash hunger on the spot. On the last trip I carried a loaf of whole grain bread. If I stopped for a burger, I transferred the meat from the white bread bun to the healthier bread. Carrying fruit is fine as long as you plan to eat it!!!! Nothing makes a car smell nastier than an over-ripe banana. THINK about what foods will stave off hunger, but not ruin the car interior “atmosphere.”

12)Allow time for rest room breaks, whether you need to stop or not. But make the
stops quick and get back on the road. I have to stop every two hours to stretch out and walk. But I only walk four or five minutes before hopping back in the van. Otherwise my back aches and my legs tighten from the strain of bouncing along the road. It is also a good idea to consider the risks of riding for a long time in a sitting position. Be sure to stretch legs, wiggle feet, and walk with a fair amount of frequency to ensure good circulation.

13)Audio books and music help with long trips. Just be careful not to be too
distracted by the narrated story. And if your companion does not enjoy your taste
in audio books, use the headphones! Don’t forget the headphones. USE HEADPHONES ONLY IF YOU ARE A PASSENGER --- NEVER IF YOU ARE A DRIVER. Behind the steering wheel, keep ALL your senses sharp and distraction free. No texting! No cell phones! No I-Phone ear buds. NO HEADPHONES. You want to get back home alive, right? Think. You cannot multi-task as well as you think.

14)Be patient with your companion. Be patient with yourself. My husband’s gum
chewing drives me nuts! But that is not HIS problem. It is MY problem. Why it
bugs me is a mystery. I just look out the window or take a nap when he drives down the road, chomping away. I have no business asking him not to chew gum.

15)Finally, thank each other for everyday courtesies. Remind him or her how much you love sharing the trip. Thank him for driving. Joke around and make laughter the heart of the experience. Always laugh – not AT the other person – but with him or her!!!!! Keep the days light and memorable. In other words, have a positive attitude by CHOICE! It’s contagious.

TRAVEL TIP #8 - Hotel Safety – Watch your back

You may have guessed by now that my blog is a wee bit behind schedule BECAUSE I have been ---- traveling! Accordingly, my next safety suggestion is NEVER to disclose online when you are traveling. There are thieves who are watching your home in anticipation of helping themselves to your big screen TV, just about the time you fly off to the sunny skies of the Bahamas, Caymans or Virgin Islands.

No, I did not go to the islands, and I did not discover the real Jurassic Park. The picture on today’s blog post was shot at my always favorite retreat: Disney World. Hotels are clean. Staff is amazingly gracious. The parks are perfect. I arrived at Epcot just in time for the opening of the International Flower Show. My husband flew to Florida and we spent a lovely evening dining in “Morroco” and watching Jose Feliciano sing in concert. Yes. Feliciano’s voice is as melodic and flawless as ever. His musicianship is phenomenal. And his sense of humor is endearing. The lineup of music artists for the Festival is tremendous. I wish I could have heard EVERY scheduled concert! Performers in the near future include David Cassidy, Starship, Tony Orlando, Herman’s Hermits, the Nelsons tribute to Ricky Nelson, Atlanta Rhythm Section, Fran Cosmo (former singer of Boston), Davy Jones, and Chubby Checker and the Wildcats. If you’re close to Disney, go to dinner and a concert on the lake. Can’t beat it with a stick. Wow! What a vacation. My husband beamed from ear to ear. It helped that there are no snowblowers in Florida!

So, you see, I just returned from the sunny southeastern USA where I relaxed at Disney, rested at Club Med, Port St. Lucie at the annual Carter Center Retreat, and sauntered back through Georgia, South Carolina, North Carolina, Virginia. It was so wonderful to escape the snow drifts and 5 degrees that prevailed the day I left. Happily I’m settled back at home, and enjoying increased sunshine and gradually warming temperatures.

Whether I travel alone or with my husband, hotel safety is always a concern. There are many sources of hotel safety tips online, and I encourage you to review as much information as possible. The following list is just a personal outline of my priorities when settling down for the evening. It is not all inclusive. Again, I cannot assume responsibility for your personal safety. It is essential to use your head, use some common sense, do your homework, and trust your instincts if you feel you are at risk.

1)Choose a hotel in a safe location. And, if you think a hotel along the Interstate is the safest place to stay, think again. There are some definite advantages: no dark garage parking, no pan handlers, no bars on the windows of restaurants. But behind the “safe” appearance of shiny hotels and restaurants just off the intermittent freeway ramps is the potential for thieves to snatch and run. Easy access to a major highway system means that a thief or assailant can quickly blend in with all the other vehicles buzzing along the highway.

Once I drove a short quarter mile off the Interstate to a name brand hotel, but the parking lot appearance “felt” threatening. I turned my vehicle around, found a brightly lit inn, and called the seedy hotel to cancel my reservations before the 6:00 deadline.

2)Don’t assume that bright lights and clean appearances guarantee safety. Keep your eyes open. One recent news story in our area reported a kidnapping in broad daylight at a high end restaurant where most of us would believe we were safe.

3)Park your car at the front of the hotel, never in shadowy back lots. That means
you have to travel early in the day, and check in early in the evening.

4)If you feel uncomfortable, ask the hotel staff for assistance. When my car broke
down in Washington, DC several years ago, I asked the hotel manager for an
escort to my room from the underground garage. It was late at night and I had been attending a conference several blocks away from the hotel. Not only did the garage attendant provide a safe escort, he checked the room thoroughly (closets, bathroom, etc.) before assuring me that I would be safe.

5)One hotel experienced friend reminded me recently to deadbolt the door and
Secure the safety chain/bar immediately after entering the room. She had known of hotel clerks inadvertently assigning the same room key/number to successive
guests who walked in on people who were not expecting them!

6)When you check in, be sure that the hotel clerk does not say your room number.
S/he should write the number on your card envelope. If your number is spoken aloud, ask for another room assignment and explain why it is important.

7)Invest in portable motion detector and doorstop alarms for your room door and
windows. Pack extra batteries.

8)Choose a “safe” room, although I cannot honestly tell you what that is! I do
know that walking along dark outside corridors and walkways toward isolated
rooms at far reaches of huge hotel complexes is probably not a good choice.
The nice thing with Disney is that you can be very specific in your room request
if you make your reservations well in advance. They will try to accommodate you to the extent possible.

9)I do prefer lower level rooms in large hotels, primarily because it saves time
waiting on elevators to high floors. You can probably save an hour a day in some
cases by NOT waiting on slow elevators to stop at seventeen floors before reaching you. On the other hand, thieves/assailants on lower floors have quick
exits from their crimes, so you may be more vulnerable on a lower floor. I also have this recording in my head --- something about fire truck ladders reaching only the first ten floors of a building. I “think” Jerry Seinfeld has a story about
being in a hotel fire and sitting on the balcony waiting for someone to rescue him.
At some point, it occurred to him that no one was coming and he had to become proactive in reaching safety. I can’t say with absolute certainty that it was
Seinfeld who went through that experience, but some “old” memory tells me it was he.

I DO know that Charles Kuralt was saved from a hotel fire by a hooker who pounded on his door in the middle of the night. No one else came. Just a hooker.

10)With that in mind, check all your exits. On a lower floor, I check to see if the
windows will slide open, allowing me the MOST DIRECT escape from an emergency situation. I sleep with a small flashlight on my night stand. Emergency lights should work. So should fire sprinklers and alarms. But do you
want to trust your life to someone who gives out a room key to the guest who enters the building behind you?

At one favorite Amish country bed and breakfast I was curious. I removed
the battery cover from the First Alert smoke detector and found that there WERE no batteries. Fat chance of getting out of that second story farm house. Henceforth, I carry my own smoke detector. I’ve never carried my own carbon monoxide detector, but it is something to think about.

11)Park in safe parking spaces, away from bushes, vans, dumpsters or other objects
where assailants can hide. The kidnapped woman whom I spoke about earlier was grabbed by a man hiding in hotel shrubbery.

12)Four stars do not mean we are safe. Look at the atrocious crimes that have been
carried out at America’s finest hotels. Keep you eyes alert. Just when you think you are safe, you are not.

13)Never show your hotel room key in public places and never discuss the hotel
where you are staying.

14)Enroll in that self defense class I discussed previously.

15)If you go to a bar, you are sending the wrong message. Stay with family
restaurants on the road. Take carry-out to your room. I often stash a
grilled chicken salad in my hotel fridge and worry nothing about venturing out
at night in search of dinner.

15)If you leave your room, leave the television running, a light on, and the DO NOT
DISTURB sign hanging on your door. Create the illusion that you are in the room.

16)Carefully check closets, showers, etc. as soon as you enter the room. If there is
room underneath the bed for a person, check it! I was told several years ago that
an acquaintance was on her honeymoon, totally distracted by the romance of the
moment. In the morning when she and her husband awoke, his “good buddies”
crawled out from underneath the bed and told them to have a nice day. True story? I don’t know. Do you want to take the chance?

17)Get a room with a safe when possible and secure your valuables. Otherwise, get
a lock box at the front desk to secure irreplaceable jewelry, cash, credit cards, cameras, etc. in your absence.

18)If you don’t feel safe getting on an elevator with someone, feign distraction and walk toward other people in the immediate area. Take the next elevator.

19)Never invite people into your room. Are you really bent on self destruction?

20)Never believe the “manager” is knocking on your door. Call the front desk.

21)Use the peephole before opening the door to anyone. Look for a hotel uniform, but don’t trust it. Several years ago I was at a colorful tropical hotel where the
staff wore flowered shirts. When I ordered room service and saw a floral shirt
attired young man at the door, I cautiously peered across the safety bar, looking for a name tag and sniffing for hot food! Then I opened the door.

22)Talk about where you and your husband are going on this trip. Feign
companionship.

23)Always quickly review the safety card that is provided in your hotel rooms. Even
if you can predict the contents, reviewing the advice each time will heighten your
awareness of safety procedures. Don’t become complacent.

24)Never let anyone convince you that your are being silly taking safety precautions.
My husband admits that he feels safer when he is with me because I am so vigilant. Now THAT’s a switch! I make HIM feel safe? Good.

25)We are never safe. We are only managing space and time to minimize risks.
Nothing more. Nothing less.

WATCH YOUR BACK